Tearful Goodbyes

The loss of Stuart Scott is a big one for anyone who is a fan of sports. I have never known a world without him on my tv, recounting the newest developments in sports news. After he died a few weeks ago, I began to learn more about Stuart and how he made sports news what it is today. I simply had no idea what kind of impact he had on it. Through the touching tributes his friends have done for him, I have learned that it is because of him the sports news that I grew up loving wouldn’t have been the same without him. I learned how he stood up to racism without violence or anger but intelligence and cunningness. It wouldn’t have been so funny or full of individuals personalities. Because of Stuart Scott, the people that came after him were able to make sports news what they wanted and how they wanted to to speak to the public.

It is still just a little unbelievable I will never turn on my tv and see him again, spouting out one of his trademark catchphrases. But I know that even though he’s gone, he isnt because he’s impact on the sports world will be there forever. Everything that happens from now on will be partially because of him and his style. If anyone is wondering how an atheist like me copes will death, this is one of the ways. I’m not really scared of dying because even though I don’t believe there is an afterlife, I do believe that if you leave an impact on the world, you are never truly gone.

Tonight Danny Green is wearing special shoes to honor Stuart Scott. I hope these tributes never end and we never forget of the way he changed basketball.

Okay, so what does any of this have to do with anything this blog is supposed to be about, you might be thinking. While I can’t say there is anything good about Stuart Scott’s passing, there is one thing I saw in the tributes that was both surprising and inspiring.

In the many tributes that were made for him, there were interviews of his friends, many of them male. And those men were crying at the loss of their beloved friend. Rich Eisen, a long time friend and coworker of Scott’s, gave a touching speech on air when he learned of his friend’s death. With tears streaming down his face, he told the audience of the brave man he knew and what an inspiring life he had while he was here.

I think there is something to be said about how as a society and culture, these men felt no shame in crying on tv. There was no need or desire by ESPN to make these men seem “tough” or “strong”. They were allowed to be on tv and cry.

I think of the impact this has on all the people watching the tributes. I think of the people who are watching these tributes who were being shown our culture and society are accepting of this behavior from men.

More Than a Girlfriend

At the end of the day on Saturday at Comic Con last year, I was on cloud nine. I was feeling like a badass in my Peggy Carter army green jacket, skirt, black pumps and some killer 40’s makeup and hair. I had gotten countless compliments on my cosplay and was asked to take dozens of pictures with others who were cosplaying as Marvel characters. The really cherry on top of the day was when I got to ask a question at the Agent Carter panel (I thought I might pass out when Hayley Atwell talked to me) and got compliments on my cosplay from the cast and crew. This was one of the panels I was most excited about for that Comic Con. Captain America is my favorite superhero and the character of Peggy Carter had completely captivated me in the new movie. This show was so exciting because it would be having a woman as the main character. Getting to hear all the news about the show and seeing the sneak peaks? A pretty awesome day in my book.

I was waiting in line to buy my ticket for the trolley back when the man in front of me turned around and took in my cosplay. “Oh, you’re Captain America’s girlfriend, right?”

I was honestly a little stunned. I knew he didn’t mean it badly or was trying to be offensive, he was just making conversation. Without skipping a beat but I responded with “she’s a lot more than that, but in a way, yes.”

The man furrowed his brow in an expression I can't quite describe, laughed and put up his hands in a fake defensive pose.

His girlfriend, really? That’s what that man got when he watched Peggy try to assert herself in a world that clearly did not believe she deserved to be there? A woman who I instantly saw as strong, intelligent, brave, beautiful, honest and giving? I wasn’t angry at the man but disappointed that’s how he saw her.

So when I heard the rumors going around an Agent Carter show might be coming, I instantly told myself not to get my hopes up. I knew the show getting greenlit was a long shot, since even though there have been many successful shows with women as the lead, networks still act like it’s a risk. And even though Marvel has been pretty supportive of women lately, the aftermath of Electra bombing is still following us to this day (yes, this is part of  why we have not gotten a Black Widow movie). I was honestly shocked when I heard the news in Estonia the show was actually happening. I loved this character so much and I was so excited for more people to get to know her.

And guys, this show is not disappointing any of my expectations. I watched the first two episodes tonight and I was hooked the entire time. First off, it looks beautiful. There’s the fact clearly filmed to look like a comic book. This gives the show a very different look that others on the air. Then there’s the fact it is set in 1946 and everyone was expected to be dressed like a movie star. I love the style of the time, I really do, but to have to do victory curls everyday? I think I’ll leave that to Peggy.

Then there is the issue that faced many women at the end of the war that is being touched on in the show. When the war ended and the men came back, women who had so completely held positions and helped win the war were pushed aside. Peggy, once in charge of special projects like the creation of Captain America, is now treated like a secretary when she isn’t being sexually harassed. This show is just another reminder how grateful I should be of women who have come before me in the police department. Because of brave women like Peggy who stood up for themselves and others, I have the opportunity to achieve my dream if I work hard enough. I’m so grateful to have the protections of my rights that women like Peggy did not have when they were just trying to work. Of course, life is not perfect for working women right now, but we are making progress thanks to the women before us.

I’m also so excited to see more from this show because I really love how Marvel has developed Peggy’s personality. I love the review saying she’s not just a bombshell or she’s no damsel in distress. I think she proved those things when she won a fight with a man by hitting him in the head with a stapler. She’s allowed to be physically strong without anyone questioning it. Yes, the men around her work think she should just be as secretary, but when she actually shows her physical strength around the villains she is fighting, no one seems surprised she can handle herself. So far no man has uttered something like “but you’re a woman!”. Jarvis, Howard Stark’s butler that is now working with Peggy, has never questioned Peggy’s physical strength or if she could handle herself. He has expressed concern she is trying to do everything on her own and she needs to learn to ask for help. He tells her men and women need to learn they can not carry the world on their shoulders. It’s an important thing for Peggy to be reminded of because she feels so isolated in her job now and thinks no one believes in her abilities.

I also love Peggy has been allowed to be vulnerable. She’s strong but not a robot. The show is set right after the supposed death of Captain America. Peggy is still mourning for the man she loved and never really got to tell that she loved him. I am much happier to see Peggy cry over a picture of Steve before he became Captain America than her act like he never happened. One of the worst things we could tell women is that if you are strong, you can not cry or have love for someone else. Loving and missing Steve doesn’t take away from her strength and she knows it.

A scene I really liked from the pilot was when Peggy was in a meeting with only male agents and they began to make comments about her having sexual relationships with many men, including Howard Stark and Steve Rodgers. Only one male agent, Daniel, defends her and tells the male agents they shouldn’t talk to her that way. When the other agents leave, Peggy tells Daniel not to defend her again because she can do it herself. I think this is a predicament a lot of women and men have faced. Do you not have other people defend you and try to show you can defend yourself, or do you let others help defend you at the risk of looking weak? Peggy wants to be strong, but I think she knows she needs Daniel on her side too.

I’ve touched on this concept in other posts, but this show is so important not just because Peggy is a cool character, but because it validates strong women in our society. It’s telling the world we think the way Peggy is being oppressed is B.S. and her fighting this oppression is admirable. If not, why would people be watching?

I am just so grateful for this show being made. I see so much of myself in Peggy. All I want out of life is to help make the world a better place and not face a million roadblocks to do so in life. Peggy Carter may not have existed in real life, but women like her did. I am forever in their debt and will spend my entire life insuring their efforts are not in vain. Thank you Marvel, thank you for bringing Peggy to life and celebrating this strong, intelligent, brave, beautiful, honest and giving woman with us.

"I know my value. Anyone else's opinion doesn't really matter."-Peggy Carter